Sunday, March 29, 2015

Weirdos, Freaks and Nutjobs

You can tell there's a general election coming soon, the bullshit is getting worse and worse.

The Labour Party is claiming the Tories are going to privatise the NHS. I'm 55 now and remember the Labour Party coming out with the same lie since 1974, at least. It's a lie, if they did promise to privatise the NHS I would be definitely voting for them. It won't happen.

The Labour Party are also claiming they will  control immigration. Bullshit. As long as we are in the EU they cannot control immigration. From 1997 to 2010 they let as many migrants into the country annually as the Tory/Lib Dim coalition has since 2010. It won't happen.

My MP is David Morris, who calls himself a 'Conservative' but is definitely not, in my opinion, conservative. He's  a fantastic politician, bullshit flows from him freely and frequently. I fear the consequences of a Labour government, especially if backed up by the Scottish Nazionalists, but while David Morris is my Tory candidate I will not be voting Tory.

On Friday I received a letter from Morris on House of Commons stationery. He was telling me how he voted against same sex marriage and was responding to my enquiry about his voting intention on that issue. The vote on same sex marriage was, as I remember, in June 2013. My enquiry was prior to that. So why respond now, nearly two years later? There's a general election coming up and you can't use House of Commons stationery for party political literature. I wouldn't dream of accusing him of breaking or even bending the rules. But it makes you wonder.

Now then, Jeremy Clarkson. I've worked as a TV extra and know that the days can be very long, tedious and often freezing cold and wet if filming outdoors, it's as bad for the actors as it is for the lowly extras. Jeremy Clarkson had spent a very long day, sixteen hours I think, outdoors, in shocking weather, filming a piece for Top Gear. When he got back to hotel, very late, very cold and very wet, there was no hot food. He found the producer responsible for the cock up and bollocked him severely then allegedly smacked him. Quite right too, I would have done likewise. The incompetent producer should have been sacked, not Clarkson. As a consequence the BBC will now lose millions in revenue from Top Gear. That's public service for you, fuck the taxpayer!

Finally, never believe the apologists for Islam. The father of one of the three young slappers who went off to have sex with ISIS has claimed the government, the police, MI5, old uncle Tom Cobbly and all were responsible for her vile belief in a murderous, barbaric religion. Of course him being a vile, barbaric, Islamist nutjob, as exposed in yesterday's newspapers, had nothing to do with it.Oh no, course it didn't.

May 7th is election day. One thing I do know is that nothing will change. We will wake up on 8th May still ruled by weirdos and freaks who oppress us but protect the 'human rights' of nutjobs, especially Islamic nutjobs.

Friday, March 20, 2015

The UN Says: "Be Happy You Miserable Bastards!"

If ever we needed a reminder of what a fatuous waste of time and money the United Nations is today is it. Today is the UN's International Day of Happiness so smile you git, including you lot over there in North Korea. Come on ISIS, put that cutlass down and instead of beheading that Christian, get him guffawing with a good, old fashioned Syrian, Iraqi and Iranian joke. Come on West Africa, stop worrying about Ebola for a day and get each other giggling. Vanuatu? Lighten up, you'll soon be looking back on the last fortnight and the only thing you'll remember is the UN making you happy today.

Then a few days back we had that grand old queen of England Elton John throwing yet another temper tantrum and calling for an international boycott of Dolce and Whatsit. Why was he in such an emotional state? Dolce and Whatsit, or Dolce or Whatsit maybe, had said that IVF was synthetic and that adoption should be restricted to traditional families, a man and a woman. Of course dare question the self-obsessed godmother of lifestyle and you cross the world's great and good, well, Posh Beckham and bloated, coke snorting, retired Argentinian football cheat Maradonna. (Think you'll find that's Madonna. Ed.) Yes the usual suspects who think it's cool to have a little mascot like Elton John to fawn and grovel over jumped on the bandwagon. Surprised they didn't get the Ouija board out for a quick quote from Liz Taylor.

Quite clearly IVF, by definition, is synthetic. Fact Elton, get over it you sad little git. As for adoption. Well I'm with Dolce and Whatsit on that one too. To be perfectly honest having seen and read so much about Elton John I can't imagine anybody less suitable to be a parent. But he typifies modern Britain, dare to disagree about something, especially regarding the current politically correct orthodoxy, and you fall head first into a shit storm of epic proportions, especially if it's concerning race or sexuality.

Yesterday I fell into my very own shit storm. It wasn't epic, it was a bit limp wristed coming from a Green Party tree hugger who I suspect hadn't eaten his lentils. I had the temerity on an internet forum to suggest that David Coburn, UKIP's MEP for Scotland, was guilty of nothing worse than stupidity when he said that he called Scottish politician Humza Yousaf, jokingly, Abu Hamza. It seems that because both are of similar ethnicity but one is a convicted terrorist this is racist. As I was defending Coburn, while calling him stupid (yes I know) said tree hugger then told me that I too am clearly a 'racist'. I told said Green Party weirdo that he was clearly a twat and promptly blocked him.

Two examples of how oppressive and anti free speech political correctness really is. Disagree with the politically correct and they hunt you down and, in the case of Elton John, will try to damage your business. In my case it was a dickhead using 'racist' as a term of abuse. In fact 'racist' is a word that is so misused today it is effectively meaningless.

As for the UN International Day of Happiness. About as interesting as the eclipse which seems to have only served to give saddoes in the media some sort of weird pseudo-sexual stimulation. The moon's crossing between us and the sun, big deal. I can stand on the station car park and when a truck goes up Warton Road it blocks my view of the Co-Op. Same thing surely?

Have a good weekend.

Thursday, February 12, 2015

2015-What's Happening?

I haven't blogged much this year, largely because I can't be arsed. Despite having an unhealthy interest in politics since my teens, if not earlier, I think I'm of a reasonably sunny disposition. I enjoy nothing more than a night troughing and slurping with good friends and generally having a laugh. But there seems to be an increasing number of killjoys and party poopers who take life and, more tellingly themselves, far too seriously. Here's a short list to give you an idea:



Religious nutjobs generally

Militant atheists


The State

Self-righteous campaigning groups (anti-smokers, anti-drinkers, anti-speeders etc)

Socialists really are arseholes, plain and simple. They have no grasp of basic economics and don't seem to realise that government doesn't have any money. The money government has is either ours, that it takes with threats and menace (HMRC) or it borrows. Simple really but they just don't get it,or don't want to get it.

This week saw the fortieth anniversary of Mrs Thatcher being elected leader of the Tories. Some batty socialist dick has designed a poster claiming that today's foodbanks are Mrs T's legacy. Fuck me, Mrs T left office in 1990 you knobs, since then we've had John Major, a wet fart if ever I saw one, and Labour in power from 1997 to 2010. It seems to me that socialism is actually a mental illness and that an unhealthy obsession with Mrs T is one of its most common manifestations.

As I've said it what about foodbanks? Another manifestation of the mental illness that is socialism. A great way for middle class do-gooders to get a warm healthy glow, while making a very visible point for socialists to claim the system is evil and people are starving. I'm sorry, our welfare state is very generous and if people can't afford food it's because they are blowing their dole on drink, fags and drugs or massive great tellies that they seem to spend all day watching Jeremy Kyle on while filling their faces with McDonald's in between slurping from cans of cheap lager and drags on fags. Need some pot? Pop out and flog some of that gear they got from those mugs at the foodbank.

I don't think I need to go into much depth about the muslims. A couple of thousand demonstrated in London at weekend. It wasn't against the murders in Paris, it wasn't against ISIS, it wasn't against female genital mutilation and it certainly wasn't in support of the Saudi blogger sentenced  to 15 years in chokey and 1,000 (one thousand) lashes. Oh dearie me no. It was against cartoons of their 'prophet'. In the process they climbed and sneered all over statues of British heroes in Whitehall. Tell you what, if you want respect try giving your host country a little respect first, then you may actually earn some respect.

And if you are one of those who wails: "These extremists don't represent Islam" I suggest you do a little research.

I'm not going to draw any parallels between Islam and Christianity because there is no comparison. But there are plenty of pious, self-righteous nutjob Christians who piss me off. Thankfully they don't tend to slaughter people who they disagree with. But they don't seem to realise that being preachy and constantly trying to convert people just makes them look desperate and slightly unhinged.

Jesus turned water into wine. So why do religious freaks think alcohol is evil? Would a Jehovah's Witness rather see their child die than have a blood transfusion?

Militant atheists. Well it's just as much an act of faith to believe in God as to not, I can't prove that he does exist any more than an atheist can prove he doesn't. So why can't atheists just get on with their lives without obsessing about something they claim not to believe in? Is it some weird psychological thing and deep down they are suppressing serious religious belief? Maybe that's the case with Dawkins although I suspect he saw a niche in the market and went for a nice little earner and the fame/notoriety he's probably craved since infancy.

Jobsworths. What a pain in the arse they are. I recently went to collect something from my wife's car. I pulled up next to it in the car park hopped out, leaving my door open, grabbed whatever it was from her car and got back in mine. Before I could even shut my door a twat in a cap and a high vis jacket had a dig at my parking threatening to ticket me. The car park was virtually empty. We had a frank exchange and I left. That is a typical jobsworth, thick and incapable of independent thought, in other words commonsense. They're everywhere and seem to be proliferating. We need a cull!

I am not going to bang on about the state. Read this blog and you will see the contempt in which I hold the state.

Likewise those self-righteous, nanny state campaigning groups who are probably funded by you and I from our taxes and are making a fucking good living lecturing and patronising us. I have also banged on about them frequently elsewhere on this blog.

We send millions of quid in aid to India to see them launching a space rocket this week. The only way that could be justified is if they put the staff of groups such as PETA, ASH, Alcohol Concern and any number of other mithering bastards aboard said rocket and never allowed it back to earth. Not forgetting a fair few of the above too. A bit like a reverse Noah's Ark.

There. That feels better.

Wednesday, January 14, 2015

Je Suis Charlie, But....

Today's Front Cover
So today the latest edition of Charlie Hebdo goes on sale  and according to reports they 'lampoon' the Roman Catholic church, the Jewish faith and yet again have a cover featuring the prophet Mohammed. I wonder what that says about Charlie Hebdo?

Not being a fluent French speaker I can only get the gist of  the cartoons I've seen from the magazine and they strike me as being designed to shock and offend, not just the cartoons attacking Islam but those attacking other religions in the magazine too. If cartoons are pithy and make a searing point then that is satire. If they are designed to simply offend then that is not satire but abuse and provocation. Whatever an individual's take on the reasoning for cartoons, the written or spoken word, or film, free speech should be sacrosanct and nobody should be afraid of consequences, especially the evil consequences inflicted on Charlie Hebdo last week.

But let's step back in time a few years. Leading people behind Charlie Hebdo, including 'Charb' Charbonnier who was murdered last week, organised a petition that garnered over 170 000 signatures to have the French National Front banned. This seems at odds with the philosophy that free speech is an inalienable right. You might despise what a party like the National Front stand for, but freedom of speech doesn't include the rider 'as long as I approve'.

Having said that we all know too well how political correctness is undermining free speech. Yesterday in the supermarket I read the front page of The Sun, not my newspaper of choice. It carried the story of former Coronation Street actor  Ken Morley being thrown off Celebrity Big Brother for passing on a corny old anecdote that included the word 'negro'. Now forgive me but I'm not sure when the word 'negro' was designated racist, a bit old fashioned maybe, but racist? I'm not comparing being thrown off a dodgy TV show with being murdered in your office but both actions were taken because of the modern day crime of 'causing offence'.

It's interesting that the two British newspapers to show solidarity with Charlie Hebdo yesterday by showing cartoons from the magazine were The Guardian and Independent, not newspapers renowned for supporting free speech but for slavishly following the line of 'free speech, as long as I agree and don't think it offends'. Freedom of speech should be unequivocal, tempered by respect rather than law. Unfortunately the liberal left in Europe demand free speech for themselves, no matter how offensive they want to be, but woebetide anybody who practices free speech that doesn't adhere to their liberal/left agenda.

The left are tediously regular in justifying the curtailment of free speech with the corny old phrase 'free speech doesn't mean you can shout fire in a packed theatre'. Well if you see smoke you should actually.

Maybe putting deliberately offensive and provocative cartoons in a magazine is the liberal left equivalent of shouting fire in a packed theatre. Just a thought.

Wednesday, December 31, 2014

2015, Election Year

Having suffered four years of wishy washy, wet government May 2015 gives us the chance to bin the coalition of cheats, thieves and liars. Or does it? Maybe the electorate gets what it deserves and next year's general election will punish us with a bunch of similar, maybe even worse misfits taking power than this lot.

Let's face it political correctness, that strange form of mental illness, continues to devour what's left of freedom and democracy and brands commonsense policies dangerous at best, evil at worst. Dare to call for controlled immigration and you are branded an evil racist.

A fine recent example of hysterical PC branding was when US commentator Rush Limbaugh asserted that James Bond should not be played by a black actor on the grounds that Ian Fleming created Bond as the son of a Scottish father and French Swiss mother. Of course the shit hit the fan and he, and others, were pilloried for such evil racism. I suppose, therefore, that we will soon see Russell Brand playing the lead role in a bio pic of Nelson Mandela's life.

Don't agree with gay marriage? Many of us have been branded evil homophobes for daring to question the idea of gay marriage. I don't have a problem with gay couples having all the legal rights that heterosexual couples have. I don't have a problem with civil partnerships. I just believe that marriage is, and should remain, the joining together of a man and a woman. Call me old fashioned but do not brand me homophobic, because I'm not.

Dare to comment on the stonings, beheadings, crucifications and more carried out by muslims and you are branded an Islamphobe. The apologists for Islam claim that it is a peaceful religion full of joy and goodness. Well maybe ISIS are rogues but look at any muslim state and tell me you, especially if you are a woman, would like to go and live there. Public executions, often shown on TV? Women arrested for driving? Women stoned to death for adultery or even for being raped? Homosexuals thrown in jail or facing death? Under sharia law only the males in a family can inherit? These things don't strike me as being compatible with liberal western values. But dare criticise and all those politically correct liberals who want their version of 'equality' imposed on us suddenly defend the polar opposite of what they preach to us and brand you an Islamophobe.

The politically correct loathe British people who live in France, Spain and other countries but maintain a British way of life, eating British food, shopping in British shops, playing cricket and bowls and so on. Little Englanders who should integrate cry the politically correct.

Visit a typical British city and you often find yourself in huge areas that resemble Delhi, Istanbul, Cyprus or Lahore. Wonderful examples of diversity and multiculturalism cry the politically correct.

The central element of political correctness is self-loathing. A loathing of British culture. A loathing of British history. A loathing of the British way of life. A loathing of British people. A loathing of our political system. Foreigners are so much friendlier. Foreign cultures are so much more vibrant. It is a form of mental illness involving self harm. An individual suffering this form of illness would be offered treatment.

Against this backdrop it is no wonder that next year's general election is unlikely to offer us a serious option for change. They are all scared that the media and the metropolitan elite will brand them evil extremists if they dare say anything that could be branded politically incorrect.

At one time politicians had beliefs. Does anybody know what any of our senior politicians actually believe today? At one time our politicians used to listen to the electorate. Now, because they have been so neutered by political correctness, they daren't listen to the public.

So who is really to blame for this mess? Senior politicians? Yes. One thing that would make 2015 a wonderful year would be to see the Chilcot Report published and Tony Blair hauled off to The Hague on war crimes charges. That's just for starters.

The politically correct? Of course they are to blame. In another era they would have been labelled Quislings, and quite rightly so.

But when apportioning blame the 'anti-politicians' must carry a huge burden of guilt. I mean those people who sit on their bums slagging off anybody involved in politics, be they a volunteer leafleter or an MP, just for the fact that they are involved in politics. The advent of the internet has made this problem even worse with the appearance of the keyboard warrior, who has all the answers, usually idiotically simplistic answers, but still sits on his fat arse doing nothing constructive  but slagging off those who actually stick their heads above the parapet and try to change things. The 'anti-politicians' do more than anybody else to drive people away from politics thus leaving political parties in the hands of an ever dwindling band of misfits.

For the first time in decades I won't be involved in the next election in any way, a combination of disenchantment and finding that trying to engage the average voter is like trying to raise the dead. An utter, demoralising waste of time. I doubt I'll even be voting in May 2015, for the first time since the local elections in 1980, although I spoilt my European ballot paper in 1979.

So, if you vote just for the sake of voting, even though you don't agree with any of them, don't complain when you get a government you don't like or that you accuse of not listening. You voted for them.

Before you slag me off I spent around 35 years trying to make a difference, but when banging your head against a wall gets really painful you stop. Think you could do more and better? Then get off your lazy arse, leave your keyboard alone and get involved.

To those who are still motivated enough to plod the streets knocking on doors on behalf of a candidate, stuffing envelopes in a draughty campaign office or sticking their heads above the parapet to actually stand for parliament I wish you luck, and the New Year you deserve.

Thursday, December 25, 2014

Will You Walk With Me?

Will you walk with me
If I have to flee
When my freedoms are lost
And I bear the cost
Of Sharia Law
And my back is raw
Because I showed my face
And they don’t like my race
Will you walk with me?

Will you walk with the pawn
His spirit torn
Sitting on his knees
Hoping for a reprieve
Sad farewells he sends
As his neck is bent
To his family
As a homily
Will you walk with him

And the slaves they take
The displaced they make
Take their way of life
Or they’ll feel the knife
For they have no heart
If you don’t take part
In the slaughter
Of the infidels daughter
Will you walk with them?

And they’ll blow up planes
And they’ll blow your brains
Shoot you in the street
A job complete
Crucify and maim
Shouting you’re to blame
So if it’s all the same
As they feel no shame
Will you walk with me?

Friday, December 12, 2014

Twat of the Year 2014: Russell Brand

Until last night's BBC Question Time Tony Blair was frontrunner for this blog's Twat of the Year award, by quite a distance. Then those cuddly pinko lefties at the BBC invited Russell Brand, who describes himself as a 'comedian', onto Question Time.

He's about as funny as a dose of clap. In a sterling performance of unrivalled fuckwittery he romped home leaving Blair way back. Hopefully Blair's consolation prize will be an appearance in The Hague on war crimes charges.

For sheer stupidity, shallowness and appalling mauling of the English language Brand is unrivalled. He is a motor mouth with a small range of cheap slogans that appeal to the political mong fraternity but clearly lacks intelligence and originality.

The day the working classes need a  pampered, petulant multimillionaire like Brand on their side is the day we might as well give up.

Friday, December 05, 2014

David Morris MP, Morecambe and Lunesdale Constituency

Yesterday we had yet another tedious questionnaire from our MP David Morris. We receive so many from his 'team' I tend to think of him and his 'team' more as a polling firm, a poor man's MORI, than as a Member of Parliament.

Consultation is one thing, but when I have asked his position on a couple of serious issues his response has been that he will wait and see what his constituents think. Now forgive me but I thought MPs were elected on what they, and increasingly their parties believed. It seems that Morris has no opinions, beliefs or principles other than to get re-elected. I can't help thinking that if he polled his constituents about the slaughter of the first born in every household and they wanted it he would probably campaign for it.

As he seems to have no beliefs I won't be voting Conservative in May in next year.

Tuesday, December 02, 2014

Elections, Lies and Propoganda

It's started even earlier than the build up to Christmas this general election campaign. Problem is I can just about put up with Christmas decorations  going up in September because I love Christmas, but lying scheming politicians trying to buy my vote is another thing.

David Cameron's Tories started the ball rolling pretending they had got the EU to back off stealing even more of our money. They lied.

Then Cameron starts talking like a Eurosceptic. He tried that one before the 2010 election. He lied then and he's lying now.

Cameron talked about slashing immigration before the 2010 election. It's got even worse with around 250,000 a year joining us. Guess what? He's talking tough on immigration  yet again. But we all know that as long as we are in the EU he can do nothing about it. He's lying again.

Miliband's shower of shysters are dangling an extra £2b for the NHS to try and buy us off. Well tell you what Burnham, cut the huge amount of waste in the NHS, cut the huge salaries of senior staff, make the whole damn thing more efficient then I might be able to bear you taking my hard earned cash and spending it buying votes. Problem is government has no money, it's our money they blow.

Then you get Labour's pathetic constant cry that the Tories will privatise the NHS. It's lies. I remember Labour saying that in '74 and it still hasn't happened, they haven't got the balls. If the NHS really was the envy of the world it wouldn't be an exclusively British institution, they'd all be doing it. I would actually vote Tory if they did promise to privatise it. We can hardly despise politicians then let them take charge of our healthcare and expect it to work. Imagine how bad beer would be and cars would be if those industries were run by the state. Not a nice thought.

Then there's Nick Clegg's gang of misfits. Now stop tittering, it's cruel. I don't even know what, if anything, Lib Dems believe in any more. They're clearly finished, thankfully.

But brace yourself, there will be constant shit storm of lies and promises that will be broken between now and the election in May. It's going to get worse.