Motorway Madness (Mithered In Scotland)

If you want to be mithered and nagged in the style of a Les Dawson mother-in-law joke, then drive up the M74 to Glasgow. What a pain in the arse!

Every matrix sign is used to hector you, and there seems to be one every few miles. I know they have a soviet style, nanny state, cradle to grave, devolved government but bloody hell, the hectoring and mithering on the motorways signs would put me off ever considering moving to Scotland, let alone the prospect of being patronised by a twat like Alex Salmond.

Between Cumbria and Glasgow I was mithered by matrix signs above the motorway telling me to fasten my seat belt, check my tyre pressures and keep my windscreen clean. Presumably not at the same time and not while driving. I was told to respect the driving conditions, not to drink and drive and to allow faster vehicles to overtake safely. There were more commands given me but I can't remember them, and thankfully none told me to make a note of these orders as I passed them.

What seems obvious to me is that the more seconds a motorist spends looking at signs on the road the more chance he will drive into another vehicle or drive off the road, meaning disaster. A good metaphor for mithering, interfering government really.