Saturday, September 26, 2009

Signs You're Getting Old

Enjoying a pleasant glass of red before getting an early night (on a Friday!) to watch a Wallander, Mrs B and I were ruminating on how our lifestyle had changed since plighting the troth in '88. Below is our little list of ageing signs:

1-We used to go to the pub, then a club, then go for a curry. Then we dropped the club and went straight from pub to curry house. Now we have wine in the house and have a curry delivered.

2-Bed was for sex and sleep. Now we get an early night to watch a bit of telly before kipping.

3-You start sharing a portion of fish and chips.

4-When you're out for the day you're more likely to pop into a cafe for a brew than a pub for a pint.

5-The Sex Pistols make you all misty eyed and nostalgic.

6-You no longer have road rage, but your cautious driving causes it in others. (That's Mrs B I think).

7-When you go to see your favourite band the drummer has to be helped off the stage by a couple of roadies.

8-You take a photo at above concert and when developed (another sign of age) there is a sea of bald heads between you and the stage.

9-Rather than getting angered by prats, pillocks and arseholes you just think "life's too short", probably because it actually is!

10-People start exclaiming "God, you were alive when England won the World Cup?!"

11-You remember when Tetley were more famous for beer than tea bags.

12-You keep referring to last year as 1998 or even 1988. That one's a bit worrying actually.

13-Referring to friends other halves as 'boyfriend' or 'girlfriend' sounds absurd, verging on kinky.

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